Every day it gets harder and harder to connect and be with you. We are having too much of an intense fight and it feels like you want to flip our world upside down… I know this sounds intense… But that’s how it feels…. I want to be the stable foundation for us. I want you to be the foundation as well. We can keep each other and ourselves grounded….

I hope you know, I love you and I would love nothing more than to understand you more than you can understand yourself. At times I think I do…. Even if we fight… I can see good and bad sides come out and understand both….

Do you know…. You doubt me… you hate me… you think the worst of me… when we fight…. But when I state the bad side, you get defensive and let me know how awful I am….. I know this happens to you too…. So don’t worry. I’m also taking responsibility… It’s both of us… I just want us to accept it and simply talk about how it makes us feel and how we can tackle it together….

It’s hard to let you know stuff about yourself without getting hurt. It’s hard to continue when I’m hurt. I’m sleepy… I really am… It feels like you don’t let me sleep nor care about my condition…. and right now, I feel selfish typing this away…. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to only think of myself…

I hope you are doing better…. I know we fought harshly, but I hope you know I will always be here waiting for you…

Working on things like these will make me not repeat the same mistakes…. It’s hard to fix the habit tho, so bear with me for a little while…. Don’t fall out of love with me… because I’ll truly be sad..

v/r

I