I know I feel tired and exhausted when things go wrong. To fix this, I need to engage more in Nonviolent Communication. NVC technique requires that I begin describing what I see or hear in the situation without adding judgement or my own interpretation. This is ultimately to learn how to talk about the situation without attacking others and my own nonsense opinions. The goal here is to improve the way people relate to each other.

Afterwards, I need to understand my feelings and communicate my needs, otherwise I’ll feel burnt out due to unfair balance of needs. Then I can ask/request for certain things from the other partner. I need to focus on my feelings and needs rather than pointing out problems and flaws. The goal here isn’t to blame my partner for how I feel. It’s about owning my feelings and explaining the situation in a way that encourages empathy, rather than defensiveness.

Relationship is where things are shared and balanced. But I feel like it’s not for me at times. I am not sure why I feel like things are unfair. I need to understand my own limit or my own boundaries, I need to be direct and clear about my needs, and I need to ensure I am able to understand it myself and what it will bring into relationship dynamics. At times, I feel like I am carrying the weight of the relationship (financially, emotionally, and practically), but I believe that isn’t true.

I need to look more into this so that I can fix this and that I can communicate this feeling well. I need to find tools to see where this feeling comes from and how I can make it better….